I'm becoming a cry-baby lately. I don't like the way I'm turning into. I used to be stronger by myself. But nowadays, after knowing you, you seem to see through alot of my weak (weakest) sides... Seems like I can't hold on to my mask anymore, before you.
I cried last night (or rather this morning) again. AGAIN?! I just felt wronged and misunderstood for you twisting my good intentions on you into something that so bad that you said: "You don't need a friend like me since you are so calculative", "Let's just end the friendship so you can don't call/text to disturb me anymore", etc.
What more is that I really have no idea if you really meant (all these) what you've said and was angry but used "joke" as a way to cover it up and make me feel better and to forgive me, OR you really was just joking about such a serious and critical thing (for me at least)! I honestly and sincerely treasure every single person and my friendship with them and for you to use "ending friendship" easily as a joke (if it's really a joke?), I'm really saddened by your attitude and choice of words used. Cried because of the two reasons above. And was both relieved that you (might) really be joking about it and don't mean anything serious OR that you're trying to hide your anger by covering/ending everything up by saying "JOKE" is all I'm doing. Maybe I lied. I was really a lil angry when I learnt of the truth (the truth you meant).
Hope the "truth" is really the "truth". Not anything to make me or make yourself feel better and get over it.
Lost control and cried a little just now again. Brooding about the matter again and when you called, I can't control my sadness and a lil anger again. I'm always searching for problems and troubles huh?
Another thing is my dearest mei mei. From what I've heard, she cried so hard last night at the shop, behind him. Wishing she's better now cos I knew she can't be ALRIGHT de...
